May 8
“Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10)
The scripture above says much about the need to have an accountability partner as we spoke about yesterday. If you are fortunate enough to find a trustworthy, faithful accountability partner, the following are the list of things that I think you should do for one another.
- Maintain confidence. Everything shared in such a relationship should not be shared with anyone else unless permission is specifically granted. (The very rare exception to this may be in situations of criminal activity or when someone’s life or health may be endangered.)
- Pray for one another. In my experience, few people are interested in praying. Talking is necessary and enjoyable, but personally, if I am not praying with my partner, I feel like I am wasting their time and mine. Praying together is one of the greatest benefits of this time. You don’t even have to talk, just pray together, and all the necessary things can be communicated. Make sure that you reserve ample time for prayer each time you get together. That is the most important thing you will do.
- Encourage one another. Look for ways to build up the other. Pray that God would not let you fall into envy if the other person seems to be in a better position than you. Ask the Lord to show you how to benefit the person and minister to them in a deep, eternally meaningful way.
- Listen carefully to one another. Don’t interrupt or think you know the answer and start giving advice. Preferably, you wouldn’t give any advice unless the other person asks or you have prayed about it and it seems like something you need to say to them. Do far more listening and asking questions than talking and giving opinions.
- Be genuinely concerned for one another. If you aren’t developing a brotherly love for the person, the relationship won’t deepen or last long. Ask the Lord to give you both a genuine compassion and concern for one another’s well being.
- Challenge one another. Sometimes we can be too opinionated, and sometimes we don’t speak up when we should. Ask tough questions about how your partner is doing spiritually and with overcoming temptations in their life. If they are off base scripturally, tell them so in a kind, caring way.
- Hold one another accountable to overcome sin. Make that a key part of your purpose for getting together. Expect that of one another, and expect that you will be asking one another about that each time you meet.
- Meet regularly with one another. I recommend weekly meetings. You may have to meet early in the morning to avoid other commitments. I also recommend not meeting in a public place but rather a private place or in one of your homes, so that you can pray intensely and talk in private without being embarrassed or disturbing others.
If you don’t have an accountability partner, ask God and keep asking God for one. We all really do need one, I believe.