May 22
“And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.” (Ephesians 4:32)
We have been talking about various sins that we individual Christians can fall into and not really realize it. We are tempted every day and stumble everyday in our blind spots without even being fully aware that we are sinning and displeasing the Lord. Or we know that we are sinning, but somehow have made excuses for ourselves and have quenched what the Spirit is trying to tell us about those sins. Although there are many more sins we could discuss, I’ll mention just one more and wrap it up.
PASSIVE AGGRESSION. Passive aggression is when we don’t outwardly say “no,” but we by our actions communicate that we are not willing to do what is requested of us. I believe the first son in Jesus’ parable in Matthew 21:29, a parable about the Pharisees, who said he would go into the vineyard but didn’t, was passive aggressive. No doubt he had his excuses if his father were to question him, as do all people who are passive aggressive, and yet progress isn’t made. They use a lack of action to punish other people. Are you passive aggressive in any way, toward anyone? Do you say you will do things and don’t, knowing full well when you say you will that you don’t intend to take the task seriously? Do you let the requests of others, especially your spouse and those closest to you, go unfulfilled? Do you work slowly or not at all on the requests of others so they won’t ask you again or to punish them in some way? Are there requests from your spouse or loved ones that they have asked you to do, and for weeks, months, or years you have not done what was requested of you or finished the job?
I have spent so much time on these sins the last twelve days because I think we as Christians sin a lot more than we realize, in ways that many of us are blind to, deceived about, or hardened toward so that we don’t even recognize our sins. We cannot resist temptation if we don’t even recognize our sins. Being aware of and sensitive to these many areas of sin, especially less obvious sins that maybe are easier to hide from others or at least those outside our immediate family, will enable us to begin seeing how and when we are tempted. If you are not sure about whether a particular behavior or habit of yours is sin, ask yourself, “Can I envision Jesus doing this or thinking this way?” and “What would Jesus do in my situation?” Also ask, “Am I walking in love when I do this?”
Once we are aware that a particular way of behaving or interacting towards others is sin, the next step is to dig deeper and ask ourselves, why do I do what I do? Why am I inclined to behave this way? When did I develop these habits? Who am I modeling my behavior after? How is this behavior hurting others and dishonoring the Lord? Regular prayer that the Lord would take these things away and make you a changed person is a first essential step, but you also may need to do Bible studies and research on the behavior from secular sources, talk to pastors and other knowledgeable people about the negative behaviors, and discuss this perhaps with those you have offended. They will probably be able to give you an earful on how offensive and difficult you have been because of these behaviors. At least you should apologize to them if at all possible.
Step one in resisting temptation when it comes is to truly be able to recognize the sin you are being tempted to commit. Tomorrow we will discuss the second principle related to resisting temptation when it comes, realizing the potential consequences and opportunity that temptation brings.