May 7
“Iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” (Proverbs 27:17)
As explained in the Overcoming Temptation booklet, an accountability partner can be a huge asset in helping us to overcome temptation. We all need someone with whom we can share our deepest concerns in confidence. We all need someone who will give us godly, biblical counsel. We all need someone who will rebuke us and challenge us and tell us when they think we are wrong. And we all need someone who will pray for us and with us regarding our needs and come along side us to help us in our burdens and trials.
We all need this, but finding such a person can be very difficult indeed. In the past, I have had a wonderful prayer partner, someone who spent an hour a week with me on our knees together. Someone with whom I could share concerns and burdens that I could not tell my wife, lest I upset her. We were like-minded in many things. But then he moved away, and I have been searching for another like-minded man ever since.
At other times I have been very surprised at the unresponsiveness of men to my request that they hold me accountable. I asked an individual to hold me accountable for a sin that I was struggling with; I requested that when they see me they ask how I am doing in such and such an area. I received a positive response, but no questions have been asked. I asked another individual in the same church, and I received the same affirmation but no help or further questions to me. I asked a third man, with the same result. I asked a fourth man to simply ask me how I was doing in such and such an area if he happened to see me on Sunday mornings or to text me and ask me during the week, whatever was most convenient to him. This individual did not commit to doing it. He was concerned it would not “work for him” to do such a thing. I asked a fifth individual, and he was very willing, but he was also very busy and instead of asking once a week was only heard from once a month or so.
I have tried meeting with other men for prayer once a week. I was really struggling and really felt the need to pray. I know those men were also going through some major struggles and could use the prayer also. However, in both cases, after not too long of a time, I felt like I was bothering them, so I stopped initiating the prayer times, and neither one of them contacted me or said anything to me about prayer after that. I enjoyed the prayer times we had, but I guess not all of us have that as a priority. I have had another prayer partner who I found out later was saying exaggerated and untrue things to others behind my back.
I mention these things because you may likewise find it difficult to find someone that is trustworthy and willing to meet with you and hold you up in confidence before the Lord. You may have had a bad experience with someone, and now you are no longer interested in such a relationship. Some of the individuals I referred to above were pastors and elders, so even they can fail us at times. If anyone asked me to pray with them or hold them accountable, I would welcome the opportunity and take it very seriously.
If anyone asks you to hold them accountable and pray for them or with them, take it very seriously and treat that request with the utmost respect. If you don’t have an accountability partner, pray that the Lord would bring a trustworthy, like-minded individual to you with whom you can pray and share your burdens. We all need one, I believe, and it can greatly help us in overcoming temptation.